I initiate contact with men in an age-range of about 3 years younger up to about 8 years older than myself.The potential matches that the site sends me are age appropriate for me, but when I look at the age-range that those men desire, (usually 35-50) I often move past them, knowing I can’t compete with women in their desired range, even though many of those men are as much as 5-8 years older than me!I agree with everything Evan says and based on your advice Evan Ive tweaked my profile with your suggestions e.g. Most importantly I agree your photos have to be great.I chose to adjust my age down a few years since I was being eliminated by what seems like half the men my age when I put my real age. I’ve noticed after my last birthday (I turned 54 in June) that the response I get on has dropped to almost nothing.
I have taken your and others’ advice about profile writing, and I have great photos, so I feel confident that the problem is not in how I present myself. It always comes out eventually and I’d hate to have to explain myself then.Ok Cupid found that when some men think a woman is ugly, other men are more likely to message them.This is partly because they have unusual features that may divide opinion, but also because men think there is less competition While Holly Willoughby (left) is often described as beautiful, Sarah Jessica Parker (right) tends to get a varied response.I assume the reason for this is they can get younger women to respond to them, so why would they go for me when they have a chance with the 45 year-old version of me?If their first wife was their age, like a college sweetheart or whatever, they probably feel entitled to a newer model, so to speak. It’s frustrating, not to mention depressing and more than a little humiliating.